Hollywood's original Pet Vets (Calling All Curs, 1939)

 The Three Stooges are a trio of veterinarians entrusted with a valuable dog whose owner has anxiety issues, especially since the dog gets kidnapped right out from under the boys' noses.

Portions of "Calling All Curs" were later used in "Stop, Look, & Laugh", and in Jump 'n' The Saddle's "Curly Shuffle":

A change of pace for the boys, considering they're usually down on their luck or day laborers. Curly, in particular, was a dog lover off screen, so this was a labor of love for him.

Rating: A-.

Marryin' Stooges (In The Sweet Pie & Pie, 1941)

 Every now and again, the Three Stooges would be given romantic interests. In 1941's "In The Sweet Pie & Pie", however, the boys are manipulated into a triple wedding by a conniving lawyer (an uncredited Richard Fiske) to help three socialites collect an inheritance. The boys have been accused of crimes they apparently didn't commit, and are subject to be hanged, but, oh, is that shyster about to find out the truth.......

Rating: A-.

How people really see the Trump administration: I'll Never Heil Again (1941)

 "I'll Never Heil Again" is the sequel to the 1940 Three Stooges short, "You Nazty Spy" (and we'll get to that one another time). 

A Hitler knockoff named Hailstone (Moe Howard) has taken over Moronica. The former king's aides have regretted their decision, and seek to restore the king......

The long break showcasing the map will leave you in stitches the rest of the film. Trust me.

Rating: A+.

While the fate of Hailstone won't await president Trump, the fact that the latter's administration makes the Stooges look like geniuses.....

On DVD: The Three Stooges in False Alarms (1936)

 It's been a while since we checked in on The Three Stooges.

In "False Alarms", the boys are firemen who just can't seem to stay out of trouble, especially when it comes to their girlfriends. Ohhhh, boy.......

Rating: B.

Rockin' Funnies: Junk Food Junkie (1976)

 After hearing this on the radio today, I thought I'd try to find our next item on YouTube. Sure enough, there is a clip, from The Rich Little Show.

Singer-songwriter & radio personality Larry Groce hit the top 10 with "Junk Food Junkie". He may be better known for his work on National Public Radio, where he's been hanging his shingle since "Junk" left the charts.

Until today, I hadn't even heard this song. Sounds like Groce was making mockery of health food mavens like Euell Gibbons, and celebrating the sweet tooth we all have.

The fatal price of beer: Beer Barrel Polecats (1946)

 The Three Stooges decide to make their own beer during prohibition, but overcharging for the suds gets them in prison. Here's "Beer Barrel Polecats":

Rating: B.

Back to School Week: Violent is The Word For Curly (1938)

 The Three Stooges are mistaken for college professors, and end up charming some young ladies with "The Alphabet Song" in "Violent is The Word For Curly":

Rating: A+.

On DVD: Harvey (1958)

 Mary Chase's whimsical tale of a man and his invisible best friend was adapted for television for the first time on CBS' DuPont Show of The Month in 1958.

"Harvey" made its way to the small screen 8 years after the original feature film based on Chase's 1944 play, starring James Stewart, had been released. Art Carney (ex-The Honeymooners) steps into Stewart's role as Elwood P. Dowd, an eccentric man about town whose best friend is an invisible, 6', 3 1/2 " rabbit named Harvey. Our ensemble also includes Marion Lorne (ex-Mister Peepers), Jack Weston, Larry Blyden, Charlotte Rae, Fred Gwynne, & Elizabeth Montgomery.

Producer David Susskind and his Talent Associates group retained the television rights, and 14 years later, mounted a shorter version for the Hallmark Hall of Fame, then on NBC. Stewart and Jesse White returned to reprise their roles from the movie, and Gwynne, six years removed from The Munsters, would reprise his role from this production as the cab driver. The 1972 version also included the husband & wife team of Martin Gabel and Arlene Francis.

Marion Lorne & Elizabeth Montgomery, as you know, would reunite on Bewitched during the first half of the series' run, with Lorne as Aunt Clara. Gwynne, as you also know, would co-star on Car 54, Where Are You?, with Charlotte Rae in a supporting role, just 3 years after the above production. Larry Blyden fronted his own sitcom, Harry's Girls, before transitioning into a game show host up until his tragic passing in 1975.

Rating: B.

Countdown to Christmas: The Girl in The Emporium (The Adventures of Ozzie & Harriet, 1961)

 We had this up before, and then, it was taken down by YouTube. It's back.

"It" is "The Girl in The Emporium", from season 9 of The Adventures of Ozzie & Harriet, that season's Christmas episode. Rick's going shopping, not just for gifts, but, if he's lucky, a date.....

Rating: B.

Countdown to Christmas: Joe Santa Claus (Gruen Guild Theater, 1951)

 I've been waiting to do this one ever since I bought the DVD collection that included it a few years back.

From Gruen Guild Theater comes "Joe Santa Claus", the tale of an Everyman who becomes a department store Santa, and, as a matter of happenstance, finds out what his young daughter really wants for Christmas.

You don't get these kind of stories on Hallmark or Lifetime without needing to reach for the Kleenex.

Rating: A.

Countdown to Christmas: Freddie & The Yuletide Doll (The Red Skelton Show, 1961)

 From season 11 of The Red Skelton Show:

Freddie the Freeloader (Skelton) is in a normal (for him) position at Christmas. Homeless, sleeping on a park bench. He soon finds a Raggedy Ann doll, which magically comes to life in the form of guest star Cara Williams (Pete & Gladys).

Here's "Freddie & The Yuletide Doll".

In memory of Cara Williams, who passed away on December 9. No rating out of respect.

Origin of a Classic: The Lone Ranger (1949)

You know the story. A lone Texas Ranger, survivor of an ambush, begins a crusade for justice. The Lone Ranger kicked off with a 3-part origin story in 1949.



Glenn Strange would return as Butch Cavendish later in the first season, then played other characters before leaving for Gunsmoke, where he'd recur as Sam, the bartender. As some of you know, he also played the Monster of Frankenstein in an Abbott & Costello movie. Versatile, and underrated.

Rating: A.

On DVD: McHale's Navy (1964)

Released in between seasons 2 & 3 of the series, McHale's Navy sailed into theatres in its first feature film adventure.

While the series itself was always in black & white, this was the first appearance of the cast in full color, and it would be the last mission for seaman Joseph "Happy" Haines (Gavin McLeod), who left the series after season 2.

At 93 minutes, or slightly longer than a 3-episode block, it plays like a typical episode of the series.

Trying to raise money for a local orphange leads to disaster for the crew of the PT-73, leaving the crew in deep debt to the Marines who bet on a tape-delayed race broadcast by Gruber (Carl Ballantine). Ensign Parker (Tim Conway) draws the attention of a French woman (Claudine Longet, Mrs. Andy Williams at the time), and that leads to more trouble involving a local businessman (George Kennedy), and leaves McHale (Ernest Borgnine) to contemplate a reluctant marriage to an old flame (Jean Willis). All the while, Captain Binghamton (Joe Flynn) is looking, as usual, to nail McHale and the crew for a court-martial, but you know how that works.

Unfortunately, no footage of the movie is available online, hence the poster above.

I've often discussed over in Saturday Morning Archives how some old cartoon shorts from the 60's could stand to be remade today with expanded plots. The movie version of "McHale's Navy" in 1964 shared the same problem as some movies derived from, say for example, Saturday Night Live in that a generic plot extended past its natural length often ends up falling flat. This could've played out as a 3-part episode of the series, and would've worked out just fine.

The crew, save for Borgnine and Ballantine, would return in a sequel, "McHale's Navy Joins The Air Force". Both movies would be in regular rotation locally during the 70's.

Rating: B--.

On DVD: I Led Three Lives (1953)

In the post-war America of the late 40's  & 50's, there arose a new enemy.

The Communist Party sought to subvert America's ideals, and its members were pawns of the Soviet Union. There was even an anti-Communist comic book, How Joseph Stalin Hopes We Will Destroy America, a 1-shot that is among those hard to find items of the era.

In Hollywood, the answer to the infiltration of the Communists was to do dramatized series about normal citizens who infiltrated the party as covert agents of the FBI. There was a movie, "I Was a Communist For The FBI", starring Frank Lovejoy, which had a corresponding radio series with Dana Andrews in the lead. We'll look at that series another day. Right now, though, comes TV's entry into the counter-espionage race.

I Led Three Lives is based on the memoir of one Herbert A. Philbrick, who, at the direction of the FBI, infiltrated the Communists. Film star Richard Carlson was cast as Philbrick, and served as narrator. I Led Three Lives, produced by ZIV, ran for three seasons (1953-6).

Following is the intro:



Most of the plotting seems rather redundant, which makes it a miracle that the series lasted as long as it did.

Rating: B-.

On DVD: The Sandlot (1993)

The Tri-City Valleycats & Rensselaer County hosted a community movie night tonight at Bruno Stadium, the next-to-last event at the venue this year. There'll be a dog walk coming up soon to end the season.

Anyway, the feature attraction was 1993's "The Sandlot", a coming-of-age comedy-drama populated mostly with a group of unknown young actors. Writer-director David Mickey Evans also serves as narrator as the adult version of Scott Smalls, the newcomer to a neighborhood whose youth play an ongoing game of baseball during the summer.

The gang's somewhere between Our Gang and The Bad News Bears (the 70's version), but without female members. Scott has arrived in town with his mother (Karen Allen, "Raiders of The Lost Ark") & stepfather (Denis Leary, in one of his first movie roles). The core of the story centers on "The Beast", a ginormous English mastiff which captures baseballs, among other things, and when Scott makes a mistake involving his stepfather's prized autographed baseball, one signed by a certain Yankee legend.....!

Here's the trailer:



I could honestly do without the gross-out humor in the middle of the film, but it was a popular trope by the 90's. There were two DTV sequels, in 2005 & 2007, respectively, and Evans returned only for the first of those sequels. The Valleycats devoted a night earlier this summer to the film as it marked its 25th anniversary, and used clips for the rest of the season.

Rating: B+.

Lucy meets the Three Stooges! (Three Little Pigskins, 1934)

Yeah, that would be the title if the Three Stooges had appeared on The Lucy Show or Here's Lucy in the 60's.

You see, while Lucille Ball might be better known for her red hair and gift for physical comedy, in 1934, she was a blonde actress trying to make it big. Columbia hired her for a supporting role opposite the Stooges in "Three Little Pigskins". In it, the Stooges are unemployed (naturally) before being hired to hype a football game. A case of mistaken identity gets the boys onto the gridiron, and, of course, trouble.



Normally, the Stooges would do their own stunts, but needed stunt doubles for some key scenes, especially after Curly broke his leg in the dumbwaiter scene.

Rating: A.

On DVD: Destry (1964)

Some genius at Universal decided that the tale of Destry could be retold on the small screen, except that this time, this would not be about Tom Destry, who'd been played in movies by Jimmy Stewart and Audie Murphy. No, this was his son, Harrison (John Gavin), who was fronting a short-lived mid-season entry for ABC.

The problem? Westerns had peaked, and were gradually fading away. Destry got 13 weeks, and no more. Gavin narrated the episodes in character, the idea being that a first-person narrative, which worked so well for crime dramas such as Dragnet (not yet a Universal property) and Richard Diamond, might work in a Western. Uh, not here, though you could understand if you knew going in that Harrison Destry had been a sheriff before being framed for a crime he didn't commit.

Here's a sample clip:



Gavin later became an ambassador to Mexico, long after his acting career had ended. I don't think he was given another TV series, but I could be wrong.

Rating: B-.

No, they're not cops: Flat Foot Stooges (1938)

The Three Stooges are firemen in 1938's "Flat Foot Stooges". Silent film star Chester Conklin appears as their boss, and the film was written, directed, and co-produced by Charley Chase, a long time star for Hal Roach. Co-producer Hugh McCollum had worked on a number of Stooge shorts, and also worked for Roach, as memory serves.



Rating: A.

On DVD: The Greatest Story Ever Told (1965)

As Christians the world over celebrate the birth of Jesus today, we take a look back at an epic feature film that served as a biography of the Son of God.

"The Greatest Story Ever Told" begins with the Three Wise Men, who, en route to Bethlehem, meet first with Herod the Great (Claude Rains, in his last film), who claims he wants to worship the newborn Jesus, but, as we would soon learn, he was actually interested in nothing of the sort. Betrayed by the wise men, he orders the mass slaughter of children 2 and under. Once that is done, Herod collapses and dies.

Over the course of just over three hours, "Greatest Story" moves forward in time to Jesus (Max Von Sydow) asking his cousin, John the Baptist (Charlton Heston), to baptize him, thus officially beginning His own ministry. Producer-director George Stevens filled the cast with a number of familiar names & faces, including Roddy McDowell as Matthew, Telly Savalas as Pontius Pilate, David McCallum (The Man From U.N.C.L.E.) as Judas, and Jose Ferrer as Herod Antipas, who inherits his father's throne and unholy mission. Keep an ear, if not an eye, open for a one-line cameo from John Wayne as a Roman centurion.

Here's a trailer that should help things along:

Jesus' story would be retold again and again in the following decades, most recently in "Son of God". This, however, while a box office failure, is a more definitive bio piece.

Rating: A-.

On DVD: Batman (1989)

There were those who scoffed and mocked Tim Burton for his decision to cast Michael Keaton, who had worked with Burton on "Beetlejuice", as "Batman". Never mind the fact that another Keaton film, "The Dream Team", was classified more as a comedy-drama, or that Keaton had cut his dramatic teeth in "Clean & Sober".

As it happened, Keaton justified Burton's faith in him, and "Batman" was a huge summer blockbuster in 1989.

Sam Hamm's script does take liberties with Bat-history, tying the origins of the Dark Knight to those of mobster Jack Napier (Jack Nicholson), who, in this reality, would ultimately become the Joker. Hamm's idea was that Joe Chill didn't act alone in robbing and killing Thomas & Martha Wayne, oh no. Chill didn't even pull the trigger. Napier did. I guess this would explain the mistakes the writers of "Fantastic Four" made 16 years later, as if you need me to explain that.

Anyway, Napier is a bit of a playboy at heart himself, as he's making moves on Alicia (Jerry Hall), the girlfriend of Napier's boss, Carl Grissom (Jack Palance, Ripley's Believe it or Not!). So you figure, once Vicki Vale (Kim Basinger) enters the picture, teaming with reporter Alex Knox (Robert Wuhl, "Good Morning, Vietnam") to not only learn about Batman, but also get the goods on Grissom, Napier decides to horn in on a budding romance between Vicki and Bruce Wayne (Keaton), which develops after an awkward start.

There is the famous sequence at the chemical plant where Napier takes the plunge into an acid bath that turns him into the Clown Prince of Crime. In comics, the Joker was a nameless hood who donned the guise of the Red Hood on that fateful night. Hamm must've figured that was a little too complicated, and would've been restricting on Nicholson's talent. Whatever. Tracey Walter (ex-Best of the West) helps things along as Jack/Joker's sidekick, Bob, before, well.....that would be telling, wouldn't it?

Vicki is hot enough that even Knox thinks he has a chance with her. That neither Basinger or Wuhl would return for "Batman Returns" 3 years later would suggest a few things left to the imagination.

As we all know, Burton & Keaton would depart after "Returns", and the franchise would suffer as a result until being resurrected by Christopher Nolan with "Batman Begins".

The trailer ain't much, but.......



Nearly 30 years later, it's still an all-time classic.

Rating: A.