Friday, April 30, 2021

Goofiani gets raided, then whines

 Three years after Michael Cohen had his office and home raided by the FBI, the same thing happened to Rudy Goofiani on Wednesday, as investigators seized his phones and computers, seeking evidence in his involvement in a scheme to dig up or fabricate dirt on the Biden family in the Ukraine, at the request, of course, of this week's Dunce Cap repeat offender, Dumb Donald I (Donald Trump).

So, of course, Goofiani is crying foul, but let's remember that he's being investigated by the same office that he himself ran years ago, so he might as well be crying wolf.

Worse, son Andrew, who was once famous for being with his dad at Yankee Stadium during the 2001 World Series, is now a card carrying GOPer himself. We thought he knew better. Not even 20 years later, he's become an idiot. He holds a presser on Wednesday afternoon trying to defend his dad, but it's a lost cause.

Unsurprisingly, Goofiani himself offered up nothing but BS on his Thursday radio show, then went on Tabloid Carlson's garbage hour on Fox Shmooze, claiming he still has evidence on Hunter Biden.

"Uh, don't you think he should've presented the evidence by now?"

Absolutely, but with the GOPers these days, it's all talk and no walk. The evidence is in the splinters of the windmills in their feeble little minds. It's a wonder the Goofianis' noses don't start growing like Pinocchio.

And of course, Citizen Pampers went on the phone and called Fox Bees Wax (Business) and claimed Goofiani was a patriot. I'm begging someone to have this idiot checked for brain damage.

In Arizona, they're trying another recount, but a judge laid the smack down on a Florida firm run by a conspiracy theorist because they wanted to keep their findings secret from the public. Sorry, but that ain't happening. The desert GOPers are trying to appease Citizen Pampers, but it's way too late. They're wasting their time. And ours. And, oh, by the way? Cyber Ninjas, the Florida firm, should issue a rebate since they won't find anything.

Finally, there's a headline on Yahoo! that reports two more GOPer idiots, Matt "Swinging" Gaetz and Marjorie Taylor Greene, are planning to go on tour promoting whatever lame GOPer agenda they have. They'll get more reaction from crickets, I'm tellin' ya! Worse, MTG apparently doesn't know how public education works, or so the reaction seems to be from another unhinged rant. There's no end to the GOPer stupidity.

Musical Interlude: The Girl Next Door (1964-5)

 From Hollywood a Go-Go:

Johnny Crawford (ex-The Rifleman, The Mickey Mouse Club) swapped his chaps and cowboy hat for a full time singing career after Rifleman ended. If memory serves, his first hit, "Cindy's Birthday", was released during his run as Mark McCain on Rifleman (1958-63).

In the winter of 1964-5, Johnny turned up on another series in the Four Star catalogue, the short-lived Hollywood a Go-Go, where he performs the David Gates-penned "The Girl Next Door". Host Sam Riddle does the intro:

I'm sure a lot of young ladies saw Johnny as a boy next door by that time.

In memory of Johnny, who passed away from a pneumonia, Alzheimer's disease, and, supposedly, since I've only seen this in one source, COVID. Rest in peace.

Thursday, April 29, 2021

Much ado about very little

 Current Jeopardy! champion Kelly Donohue is facing a firestorm of controversy over something as innocent as a simple hand gesture.

Photo courtesy of Facebook via Yahoo!

Donohue has been accused by more than 450 former contestants of using the above hand gesture, which supposedly represents a white supremacist group. Donohue, on the other hand, has said he is no fan of racists. After having won his first three games, when he was introduced by announcer Johnny Gilbert (no relation to ye scribe) on Tuesday, Donohue raised one finger at a time to symbolize how many games he'd won to that point.

Hindsight being what it is, Donohue might've been better served avoiding all the unnecessary drama by having his fingers point upward in a more positive light.

Of course, it helps that CNN's Anderson Cooper is the current moderator, so if there was any real drama, he'd have a first person account, which he might or might not have shared on his show, since Jeopardy! is taped in advance.

It's a slow news week. Mountains are being made out of molehills because people need something to complain about.

Wednesday, April 28, 2021

Vanity case: Coming Up (1980)

 In the summer of 1980, Paul McCartney released "Coming Up" as the 1st single from the album, "McCartney II". The gimmick here is that his normal group, Wings, isn't here, replaced by "The Plastic Macs", which is multiple images of McCartney playing all the instruments. Wife Linda gets in on the act, appearing not just as herself, but going in drag as the other backup singer.

The radio track sounds much better.

This wouldn't be the last time McCartney used extra images of himself. He did it again 2 years later for his duet with Stevie Wonder, "Ebony & Ivory".

Tuesday, April 27, 2021

Dunce Cap Award: America's Oldest Baby (Donald Trump)

 The Academy Awards, aka the Oscars, are in a ratings slump, partially due to COVID. The annual celebration of the movie industry has achieved all-time ratings lows two years in a row, including this year's event, which moved back to the event's former berth on the calendar this month due to the pandemic.

Unfortunately, space cadets like Spam Hannity of Fox Shmooze and former president Donald Trump have used the low ratings to try to pin the blame baselessly on the Democrats and whatever alleged agenda they have.

Where America's Oldest Baby has a problem is with how ABC and the Academy promote the show. 

"WAAAAHHHH! It's the Academy Awards, not the Oscars! WAAAAHHH!"

Guess what, jackass? The Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences (AMPAS) has used the Oscars nickname for their annual event since 1939, well before you were born. If you bothered to read a book of any kind, like a history book, you'd know that. There was even a movie about the event, "The Oscar", several years ago.

There were politically charged speeches on Sunday, that much is true, but the subject matter was more about gun violence against African-Americans, and attacks on other minorities, not whatever imagined Democratic agenda Citizen Pampers thinks was being discussed. That tells you all you need to know about Trump. He didn't see the show, but felt the need to rant with no evidence to support his whiny claims, as usual. What a shock.

Not quite as shocking is the fact that the unstable genius gets another Dunce Cap. I'd have Mortimer show up, but he's on vacation.

Tabloid Carlson thinks people wearing masks should go to jail

 Fox Shmooze has gotten away with calling Tabloid Carlson's nightly garbage hour an "opinion" program to avoid litigation against Carlson.

Unfortunately, to try to call Carlson a comedian would be an insult. To comedians.

Once again, Carlson demonstrated just how late night hosts Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Fallon, Jimmy Kimmel, Trevor Noah, Seth Meyers, and James Corden resonate with viewers better than he does during Monday's program.

As the screencap above indicates, the silver spooned jackass is encouraging opponents of wearing masks to call the cops on people who are following COVID-19 guidelines, even as those guidelines are changing. In other words, the people who don't want to wear masks and risk their own health are being encouraged to summon the police, just because they're uncomfortable with people obeying the rules and wearing masks.

It's been 13 months, people. COVID is still a thing because morons like Carlson have you snowblind to reality. This pandemic would've been over months ago had more people across the country utilized common sense (something Carlson doesn't remember exists unless it serves his agenda). Even if you've been fully vaccinated, you still wear a mask out of respect and courtesy until the pandemic is finally under control. With idiots like Carlson on the air, making money off stoking fear and distrust from viewers, mostly in the Bible Belt states, and in the suburbs, progress is at a relatively slow pace, not slow enough to fall behind a snail, but still.

The way I look at it, Carlson probably flunked science in school, which explains his ignorance. If he thinks this is a joke, I'd like to see him do stand-up at a comedy club, and see how far he goes before he gets pelted with tomatoes and tossed out.

Monday, April 26, 2021

It's time to give no-hit credit where it's due

 Arizona's Madison Bumgarner no-hit the Atlanta Braves in the 2nd game of a Sunday doubleheader. Unfortunately, because the game was just 7 innings, under new guidelines enacted last year, and due to a 1991 ruling by then-commissioner Fay Vincent, who was in charge of a commission on statistical accuracy, Bumgarner gets no-credit for a no-no.


Vincent's decision, 30 years ago come September, erased no-hitters from the record book that were lost in extra innings or were complete games due to shortened length (darkness, rain) or because the pitcher was on the losing team.

With 7 innings per game the norm in doubleheaders, at least for now, we're going to see this happen again and again unless current commissioner Rob Manfred changes things. And after yesterday, you have to believe people are hoping he does.

Here's a highlight reel of yesterday's game:

Vincent and his staff of stat nerds took the first steps to geekifying baseball. It needs to end.

Citizen Pampers may be meeting a collection agency.......

 This is just too rich. Literally.

Former President Donald John Ebenezer Scrooge Trump has yet to reimburse certain cities across the country for rallies held between 2015-20. How can someone be so crass & cheap at the same time? If you're Trump, it's real easy to do. Citizen Pampers is so focused on continuing to swindle the Legion of The Brainwashed, that he's ignoring the massive bills he's run up over this period.

Farron Cousins explains:

A little personal disclosure here. In my day job, I work for an insurance agency in the area. Some of our customers have had policies sent off to collection agencies when those policies cancel for non-payment. That does happen occasionally. The only thing that separates the former president from ordinary folks is his ego, arrogance, and defiance. He's so obsessed over getting his butt whupped at the polls nearly six months ago that he's developed a new reputation as a delinquent when it comes to his bills.

I wouldn't be at all surprised if the debt wipes out youngest son Barron's college trust fund.

Enjoy having your properties garnished, Trump. It's your own fault.

Sunday, April 25, 2021

Fox's last Marvel: The New Mutants (2020)

 In 1982, Chris Claremont, acclaimed writer of The Uncanny X-Men, spun off The New Mutants, a new team of heroes introduced in a self-titled graphic novel before launching a monthly series which ran for a decade. As with the core X-Men of the era, the team was a multi-national unit, comprised of:

Danielle Moonstar, a Cheyenne who had the ability to cast illusions.

Rahne Sinclair: A Scottish lycanthrope.

Sam Guthrie: Son of a Kentucky coal miner who'd hoped to follow in his dad's footsteps. He was not initially injured in the books, unlike in the movie we're reviewing.

Roberto DaCosta: Son of a wealthy Brazilian family.

Xhanh Coy Manh, a Vietnamese emigre who could control people's minds.

For reasons known only to the producers, Xhanh was replaced by Ilyana Rasputin, the younger sister of X-Man Peter "Colossus" Rasputin. Ilyana would join the team much, much later in the comics after the experience of losing a few years of her childhood in a daemonic limbo.

About 18 months into the series, artist Bill Sienkiewicz took over as series artist from co-creator Bob McLeod, and it is one of his earliest arcs that creates the core of the movie. However, artistic and creative license take over.

Dr. Cecilia Reyes (Alice Braga, niece of Sonia Braga) is presented here as a villain when she was a reluctant member of the X-Men in the comics. She recruits the kids through curious means, but it turns out she works for a sinister organization, the Essex Corporation. Danielle doesn't have her powers under control when she's brought in, but it will prove vital as we move on.

To appeal to today's audience, there's a very unexpected hookup between two characters you wouldn't expect. Ilyana (Anya Taylor-Joy) is the eye candy for the teenage boys, as evidenced by the torn nylons in several scenes. Rahne (Maisie Williams, ex-Game of Thrones) gets to be the headliner, even though it's more about Danielle.

Here's the trailer for a film that took two years to complete:

"New Mutants" is currently in rotation on HBO and is either wrapping up or will finish a stint on HBO Max.

Rating: B+.

Saturday, April 24, 2021

Stupid breeds stupid

 A Cincinnati bar owner has decided to stop showing NBA games on his TV's until Lakers star and Ohio native LeBron James is expelled from the league because of James' comments, since deleted after Columbus police killed a 16 year old African American girl earlier this week. Granted, the woman was threatening two other people with a knife, but with this taking place mere hours before Derek Chauvin was convicted of murder in Minneapolis, the timing of this incident couldn't have been worse.

Jay Linneman feels athletes should just play and stay away from politics. Kinda hard to do when you have white police officers repeatedly cutting down African Americans, regardless of whether or not they're armed, and since the NBA is a predominantly African American league, well.......!
Congressman Ron Johnson put his foot in his mouth again this week when he made some disparaging remarks regarding COVID-19 vaccines. Granted, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has reinstated the 1-dose vaccine made by Johnson & Johnson after a 10 day pause following reports of some patients developing blood clots, but Johnson's pea-brained remarks only stand to remind us of how some GOPers intentionally keep their heads in the sand.

Or, as a philosopher named Carnac might've said, Mr. Johnson, may your shower be filled with baby oil.
Congress' resident Dumb Dora, Marjorie Taylor-Greene of Georgia, boasted online about reading all 15 pages of the New Green Deal proposal championed by NY's Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, and has agreed to a debate. That was fine, but she crossed the line, as usual, by implying that AOC would be branded as "a scared little girl" if she didn't show up.

Farron Cousins, in discussing this on one of his channels earlier this week, likened Peaches for Brains' comments to a wrestling promo.

I can picture it. MTG as Charlotte Flair. AOC, or, Alex From The Block, as NXT champion Raquel Gonzalez. Any way you slice it, Taylor-Greene just made a fatal mistake. She obviously hasn't paid attention to AOC shredding other GOPers (you can check it on YouTube) the last couple of years. There's only one way to describe it, via "Forrest Gump":

"Stupid is as stupid does".
Tabloid Carlson was at it again on Friday.

Tabloid called real journalists "cowards". Which is funny coming from a silver spooned jackass whose Fox Shmooze garbage hour is all about opinions and tall tales that would make Pinocchio blush.

I would not say it's the pot calling the kettle black. That would be an insult to pots and kettles.

Classic TV: The Dukes of Hazzard (1979)

 Inspired by Gy Waldron's 1975 film, "Moonrunners", The Dukes of Hazzard, also created by Waldron, landed at CBS as a mid-season replacement in the winter of 1979.

For the entirety of the series' 7 seasons (January 1979-February 1985), the main plot centered on former Ridge Raiders Jesse Duke (Denver Pyle, ex-The Life & Times of Grizzly Adams, The Andy Griffith Show, The Doris Day Show, Tammy) and his former friend turned nemesis, Jefferson Davis "Boss" Hogg (Sorrell Booke), a crooked wolf in a white suit. Jesse gave up running moonshine to save his nephews, Luke (Tom Wopat) & Bo (John Schneider) from prison, leaving them to serve 5 years probation. Cousin Daisy (Catherine Bach) was employed at Hogg's club, the Boar's Nest, but often had to help her uncle & cousins deal with her employer's crooked schemes.

Hogg's second in command, sheriff Rosco Coltrane (James Best), was a character in "Moonrunners" as well. Corrupted by Hogg, Coltrane is stuck between doing his duty and following orders from Hogg, who married Rosco's sister, Lulu (Peggy Rea).

The success of Dukes may well have prompted NBC to spin off The Misadventures of Sheriff Lobo from B. J. & The Bear, but in doing so turned Elroy Lobo (Claude Akins) from being corrupt into more of a law abiding sheriff whose schemes never found fruition any more than Hogg's did. Unfortunately, Lobo lasted two seasons.

Dukes spawned two spin-offs. The first was Enos, set up when Deputy Enos Strate (Sonny Schroyer, "The Longest Yard") accepted a job in Los Angeles (Enos has previously been reviewed), so Hogg replaced him with his own nephew, Cletus (Rick Hurst, ex-On The Rocks), who was just as naive as Enos, but while he was inclined to go along with his uncle's schemes, his budding friendship with the Dukes negated the corruption. Enos, however, would eventually return home.

Country singer Waylon Jennings served as the Balladeer (narrator), and recorded the title song, "The Good Ol' Boys", which hit the country charts two years into the show's run. The following open comes from season 3 or 4, when Hurst replaced Schroyer in the opening credits.

During season 5, Wopat & Schneider left in a contract dispute, so Bo & Luke disappeared for a while, replaced by Coy & Vance (Christopher Mayer & Byron Cherry), who were not popular. The other spin-off? A Saturday morning cartoon, The Dukes, which was a mid-season replacement itself for CBS, and ran for 2 seasons (spring 1983-1985), with Uncle Jesse (Pyle) as narrator. Most of the cast reprised their live-action roles.

Despite the recurring "celebrity speed trap" gimmick that brought country stars like Loretta Lynn and Tammy Wynette to the show, Wopat & Schneider, each budding country singers in their own right, didn't sing on the show. 

As I've often shared here, my folks were into Dukes. What did you expect in a house that favored country music?

Rating: A-.

Friday, April 23, 2021

Celebrity Rap: Contents Under Pressure (1992)

 From the 1992 DTV Time Out: The Truth About HIV:

Who'd ever thought that Jaleel White, aka Steve Urkel from Family Matters, actually had some skills as a rapper?

White was one of a number of young stars recruited for Time Out, directed by Malcolm Jamal-Warner (The Cosby Show), who appears near the end of the video. The full length production also features Tom Cruise, Mayim Bialik (Blossom) and hosts Earvin "Magic" Johnson and Arsenio Hall.

But, check "Contents Under Pressure", a 90 second cautionary tale about premarital sex.

We'll be looking at Time Out another time.

A little of this and a little of that

 Washington's original Duchess of Dumb is back in effect.

Kayleigh McEnany, now a Fox Shmooze airhead, tried to shred President Biden's plans to expand the Supreme Court. Problem is, she got shredded herself on social media as users reminded her that the GOPers gamed the system to gain control of the Supreme Court, refusing to confirm current Attorney General Merrick Garland in 2016, then rushing the confirmation of Amy Coney Barrett last year. The GOPers are afraid of losing control of the Court, that's all it is.

File photo courtesy of Getty Images via Yahoo!

Let's just put the card on the table. Her argument was, dare I say it, Kaylame.
The NFL is allowing defensive players, particularly linemen, to wear single digits on their uniforms. Tampa Bay Buccaneers QB Tom Brady isn't a fan, but someone should remind Brady that this is a thing in the high school & college games. In high schools, most players are on the field on both offense and defense, and some colleges will assign the same numbers to offensive and defensive players (i.e. Ohio State).

That the 7 time Super Bowl champion isn't digging is a sign he's getting old, isn't it?
The Senate passed legislation that would serve to thwart the rising tide of anti-Asian hate crimes that have mushroomed over the last year due to the pandemic. The lone dissenter? Missouri moron Josh Hawley, whose excuses couldn't fill a water bucket.

Look, Hee-Hawley, this started because of your hero, President Pampers, a year ago, mocked the pandemic by attaching China to it, rather than actually do something noble and try to stem the tide.

I wouldn't be at all surprised if Hawley winds up facing some sort of unexpected scandal like fellow Washington pretty boy Matt (Swinging) Gaetz before the year is out. He certainly needs to be hoisted on his petard, too.
We're closing on a sad note.

Greg Jacobs, alias Shock G and Humpty Hump from the 90's rap group Digital Underground, passed away earlier this week at 57. Cause unknown as of press time. As Humpty Hump, Jacobs was the lead vocalist on the group's 1990 debut hit, "The Humpty Dance", which got a ton of airplay on MTV back then.

A year later, "Same Song" was included on the soundtrack to the movie, "Nothing But Trouble", directed by & starring Dan Aykroyd, co-starring Chevy Chase, Demi Moore, & John Candy. Aykroyd appears in the video, in which Jacobs raps as both Shock G and Humpty. Tupac Shakur made one of his first appearances rapping the last verse.

Rest in peace.

Thursday, April 22, 2021

A Classic Reborn: Truth or Consequences (2003-4)

 If you thought that you'd seen the last of Truth or Consequences after a short late 80's revival, think again.

In either 2003 or '04, Fox got their hands on the franchise, and decided it needed a 21st century makeover with even more dangerous and outrageous stunts, due largely to the popularity in this country of Fear Factor, which was over on NBC. There were no questions asked, contestants went right to the bizarre stunts, outfitted with body cameras. Sportscaster Chris Rose, then the host of the cable yack-fest, The Best Damn Sports Show Period, was tapped to host. 

Today, Chris is one of the busiest guys in sports television, although he's cut his workload by leaving MLB Network's Intentional Talk. He probably wishes this was lost forever. Unfortunately for Chris, but fortunately for the rest of us, game show legend Wink Martindale was able to acquire the pilot for his YouTube channel:

Keep in mind that Fox also fumbled with remakes of two other classics, Get Smart and Let's Make a Deal (rechristened Big Deal before CBS acquired Deal). Whomever was in charge of programming at the time wasn't exactly the sharpest tool in the drawer.

Body cameras on contestants. Hmmmmph. This belonged on MTV, which was on its way to losing its mission statement at that point.

Rating: C-.

Wednesday, April 21, 2021

On The Air: WWE Most Wanted Treasures (2021)

 After becoming an executive with WWE, Paul Levesque, aka Triple H, has had a vision of building a physical WWE Hall of Fame museum. Today, there's a warehouse on the WWE property in Stamford, but if Levesque has his way (and fans hope he does), that museum could get a kickstart, thanks not to the online fund raiser, but a new reality series from A & E.

WWE Most Wanted Treasures, part of a new programming deal between the network and WWE, fills out some time on Sundays while Walking Dead is on break, has Levesque and his wife, Stephanie, at the warehouse (some interviews are done at the office), and meeting with some of their contemporaries, such as, in the opener, Mick Foley, and, in succeeding weeks, Kane, Undertaker, Ric Flair, and, of course, Stone Cold Steve Austin.

Foley teams up with some authenticators from WWE for a road trip across three states in search of wardrobe or memorabilia he used as Mankind, Cactus Jack, and retro-hippie Dude Love during the Attitude Era. While Foley & Levesque were enemies back in the day, Levesque recalls an early meeting with Foley (as Cactus Jack) when the two were in WCW, circa 1993, when Levesque was starting out. To paraphrase the title of an old PPV, good enemies, better friends.

Here's the trailer, from A & E:

Foley was also a guest on another A & E show, Pawn Stars, which aired on Monday.

If WWE wants to do a poll to get that Hall of Fame in motion, I'm all for it.

Rating: A.

Tabloid Carlson casts doubt on the Derek Chauvin jury. Someone should cast doubt on his brains, or lack of them

 Late Tuesday afternoon, I was at a laundry getting my wash done. On the flat screen TV above the counter was ABC's coverage of the verdict in the murder trial of ex-Minneapolis police officer Derek Chauvin. After it was announced that Chauvin was found guilty on all three counts of murder and/or manslaughter in the death of George Floyd 11 months ago, there were cheers in Minneapolis. A customer came in a short time later, and said he was surprised at the guilty verdict.

That surprise, you see, was because of so many cases the last few years ending with police officers being acquitted by juries that couldn't really see the gravity of the evidence presented to them.

Unfortunately, neither can Fox Shmooze's resident moron, Tabloid Carlson.

On his Tuesday night broadcast, Carlson cast doubt on the verdict, claiming the jury was intimidated out of fear of more protests. What an idiot!!! Justice was finally served, and this mealy mouthed wretch thinks the jury was intimidated?

Tabloid, there is dumb, and, then, there is you.

Carlson had a former NY corrections officer on the show who agreed with the verdict, and Carlson wasn't having it, cutting the interview short because it conflicted with the manufactured viewpoint he was trying to convey to his brainwashed audience.

Here's the truth, Tabloid. Take it or leave it. Chauvin used excessive force in restraining Floyd 11 months ago. One of your own colleagues, Greg Gutfeld, on The Five, acknowledged the verdict was the right one. But, then, here you are, like the snot-nosed, silver-spooned jackass we all know you to be, casting aspersions where they don't belong or exist.

Right now, let's hear from Tabloid's agent, or at least one of them:

"No comment. Can't say anything about anything I didn't see!"

What a surprise. We tried to find the Three Blind Mice, Carlson's lawyers, but they were auditioning for a rodent version of Daredevil.

Carlson is being paid oodles of money to spew outrageous opinions, passing them off as facts to his brainwashed audience of low-information GOPers, but someone should check and see if he checked his brains at the door the day he signed with Fox Shmooze.

Tuesday, April 20, 2021

Jim Steinman (1947-2021)

 The list of artists that Jim Steinman wrote and/or produced hit albums and singles for would read like a wing of the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. Barry Manilow. Celine Dion. Def Leppard. Meat Loaf. There's an unreleased demo circulating online of a track recorded by Bette Midler early in her career.

And that just scratches the surface.

Best remembered for his decades long association with Meat Loaf, Steinman also produced or wrote songs for Air Supply (i.e. "Making Love Out of Nothing at All") and Bonnie Tyler ("Total Eclipse of The Heart" hit #1 in 1983). Steinman passed away on Monday, cause unknown, at 73.

In 1981, Steinman released his own single, "Rock & Roll Dreams Come Through", which would be covered by Meat Loaf 13 years later (the video featured a young Angelina Jolie). The modest set for the video for Steinman's version has just him and 2 dancers. Studio singer Rory Dodd is the actual vocalist, with Steinman simply lip-syncing, years before a scandal erupted that would torpedo studio acts like Black Box, Milli Vanilli, and C & C Music Factory. That's a story for another day.

Here's "Rock & Roll Dreams Come Through", circa 1981.

Rest in peace.

Whinedell is risking the careers of two veteran lawyers because he ignores the truth

 One of my teachers in high school had a habit of castigating her class on days when certain of the students weren't exactly alert.

"Stupidity runs rampant", she would say.

Coincidentally, this was in business law class, during ye scribe's senior year, 40 years ago.

For veteran lawyers Nathan Lewin & Alan Dershowitz, they're putting their legal careers, which should've ended around the time they were eligible for social security, at risk representing MyPillow CEO Mike Lindell in a defamation suit brought by Dominion Voting Systems.

Lewin, whose famous clients have included former President Richard Nixon, rock legend John Lennon, and actress Jodie Foster, was hired by Lindell. Dershowitz, who should know better, is on board as a consultant, and, according to Farron Cousins, is trying to justify Whinedell continuing to claim that the 2020 election was stolen from Donald Trump by saying the First Amendment gives Whindell the legal right to do so.

Here's Farron:

The First Amendement doesn't protect against lying, and Dershowitz knows that. I'm figuring he's taking this tack to protect Whinedell and his patron, Citizen Pampers, especially the latter, who belongs in Bellevue. Whinedell, at the rate he's going, might get there first.

We tracked down a couple of Lewin's bridge partners at the retirement home:

"No comment!"

For someone who turned his life to Christ after overcoming alcohol addiction, Mike Lindell should remember that God does not like being mocked. His case is going nowhere, and will get tossed out before it reaches the Supreme Court. Bank on that.

Monday, April 19, 2021

Weasel of The Week: Mike Lindell

 We're just learning now that MyPillow CEO Mike Lindell is fighting back against at $1.3 billion dollar defamation suit filed against him by Dominion Voting Systems. Problem is, he's risking his company's future by filing a counter-suit for $1.6 billion against Dominion.

File photo courtesy of Getty Images via Yahoo!

The counter-suit is being filed by MyPillow, trying to separate the company from its founder and CEO. They say when Lindell parroted false claims about election fraud after the 2020 Presidential election, he was speaking for himself, not the company.

Well, DUH! The last I checked, Dominion targeted Lindell himself, along with ambulance chasing dingbats Rudy Goofiani and Silly Sidney Powell. They were not, insofar as I know, naming MyPillow as a defendant.

Lindell is whining and crying because several retailers, including Bed, Bath, & Beyond and most recently Costco, pulled his overpriced pillows from their shelves. Guilt by association, you know. I remember walking through Walmart one day and seeing the pillows ticketed for $40 a pop, or double the price of lesser brands like Mainstays, a brand familiar to Walmart customers. Haven't seen them much since, and, mind you, this was before 2020.

Lindell is supposedly launching his own social media platform, Frank, later this week, but his actions could have an adverse affect on the success, if any, of his new venture. He wants it to be more of a G-rated platform by banning pornography and coarse language. All well and good, but it will be for naught if he insists on continuing this fool's crusade he's been on.

Dominion lawyers have already said that MyPillow's action is meant to distract attention from their litigation against Lindell.

What Lindell and MyPillow fail to understand is that Lindell, following in lockstep behind Donald Trump, has irrevocably destroyed his reputation, and the counter-suit earns him a set of Weasel ears this week.

And as for the suit? Pass the Sominex.

Sunday, April 18, 2021

Only in The South: Florida GOPers want to inspect certain body parts of student-athletes. Discrimination much?

 Ok, this is wack. This is bonkers. This is cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs crazy.

What "this" is, friends, is Florida GOPers, likely led by brain-dead governor Ron DeSantis, passing a law that allows state officials to inspect the private parts of high school & college student-athletes in an effort to identify transgendered women. 

Perverse? Yep, according to Farron Cousins. It's also cruel, disgusting, and, well, a legal excuse for discrimination due to sexual preference. 

Here's Farron:

Just when you think the GOPers in Florida can't sink any lower (unless it's quicksand), well......

"I don't see anything wrong with it!"

What a shock. What DeSantis and other GOPers are doing is giving license to deny transgendered women the right to compete. I think AEW wrestler Nyla Rose might want to take a meeting with some of these clowns. Nyla, you see, is transgendered, and a very successful wrestler with a national profile.

But the GOPers don't see that. They see the transgendered women as a societal perversion. The earliest case that I can think of was nearly 50 years ago, when Dr. Richard Raskind morphed into Renee Richards.

To DeSantis and the rest of the GOPers, I say this. Stop living in the past. Society today is much, much more inclusive. Learn to accept it.

Saturday, April 17, 2021

Musical Interlude: I'm a Fool (1965)

 Gary Lewis wasn't the only 2nd generation star on the pop charts in 1965.

There was also Dino (Dean Martin, Jr., aka Dean Paul Martin), Desi (Desi Arnaz, Jr.), & Billy (Hinsche, the only one without celebrity parents), whose debut came on The Ed Sullivan Show. Ed gets in a plug for Dean Sr. co-starring with John Wayne in a Western around that time as he introduces the kids, performing "I'm a Fool":

As Dean Paul Martin, Dino, Jr. co-starred in 1985's Misfits of Science, a one-year wonder for NBC which is better remembered as the first series for Courtney Cox. Desi, Jr., meanwhile, joined his mom, Lucille Ball, and sister Lucie in Here's Lucy (1968-74), and would play alongside his iconic mom after the series ended on Password Plus (Desi & Lucie played with Lucy and Gary Morton on the original Password).

Friday, April 16, 2021

On The Air: Grit & Glory (2021)

 This past winter, WWE contracted with Chevrolet to produce an online interview series, Grit & Glory, hosted by former NXT, Ring of Honor, & WWE US champion Samoa Joe, who was moved to the broadcast desk last year after a series of concussions put him on the injured list.

There might not be a 2nd season after the company's annual spring cleaning yesterday.

Joe, age 42, was among 10 wrestlers cut from the roster. We'll talk more about that after you watch this installment of Grit & Glory with 2-time Intercontinental champion, multi-time tag champion, and former US champion Big E:

Since the episode was released in February, Big E has dropped the IC title to Apollo Crews at Wrestlemania. Four days later came the spring purge. It's not a coincidence that former director of talent relations John Laurinaitis, step-father to Hall of Famers the Bella Twins, was the hatchetman, meaning he was restored to his former position. And you wonder why some of these folks got the ax:

In addition to Samoa Joe, there were:

The IIconics (Peyton Royce & Billie Kay): The Australian duo were split up for storyline reasons last year, but Vince McMahon gave up on pushing either one as a single almost immediately, making folks question why the former women's tag team champions were split in the first place. Billie appeared at Wrestlemania, partnered with former women's champion Carmella, in a tag team turmoil tournament.

Next stop?: Royce is married to AEW's Shawn Spears, and everyone's assuming that's next, although Impact has a women's tag team division, and AEW does not.

Mojo Rawley: Being pals with Super Bowl hero/detergent shill Rob Gronkowski doesn't guarantee anything. Mojo was another victim of McMahon constantly changing his plans on a minute-by-minute whim (partially because of his advanced age).

Next stop?: Impact seems likely, since he could reform the Hype Bros with Matt Cardona (fka Zack Ryder), though AEW is always going to be a possible destination.

Chelsea Green: Someone check and see if she walked under a ladder in 2020.

Green, who was a women's champion with Impact as Laurel Van Ness a couple of years back, barely had time for a cup of coffee when she was moved from NXT to Smackdown last fall. A broken wrist in her only match for the blue brand put her on the shelf.

Next stop?: Some are already suggesting a return to Impact, since Cardona, her fiancee, is there. AEW and Ring of Honor are also possible.

Bo Dallas: A clear example of creative not knowing what to do with a 3rd generation (dad is Syracuse product Mike Rotunda, grandpa is Blackjack Mulligan) talent who was a tag team champion not too long ago. Many believe he could've been added to his brother Bray Wyatt's act as The Fiend, but the creative dimwits didn't see it. Dallas (real name: Taylor Rotunda) had been on the inactive list for 18 months.

Next stop?: I'm guessing AEW would be a better fit.

Mickie James: This one hurts. A 6-time women's champion during her first run (December 2005-April 2010), Mickie was last seen doing pre-show commentary prior to NXT Takeover: Stand & Deliver last week, but the creative idiots were reluctant to put her back in the ring on a steady basis, when she can help get younger, fresher talents over.

Next stop?: The most likely destination is the National Wrestling Alliance, where her husband, Nick Aldis, is the current World champion. Otherwise, AEW or a return to Impact is possible.

Kallisto: Formerly with the Lucha House Party after runs with the US & Cruiserweight titles, Kallisto had largely been off television until last week's Smackdown.

Next Stop?: Mexico, ROH, or AEW.

Wesley Blake: Former tag team champion in NXT, Blake was called up with Jaxson Ryker & Steve Cutler as the Forgotten Sons several months ago, but Ryker's political issues got in the way. Ryker was spun off from the team, and Cutler (released earlier in the winter) & Blake were rebooted as lackeys for Baron Corbin toward the end of last year for what amounted to a cup of coffee. He & his wife, former NXT wrestler Sara Lee, just welcomed their 3rd child. Some present.

Next stop?: Your guess is as good as mine.

Tucker Knight: It was bad enough that copyright-obsessed Vince McMahon stripped away Tucker's surname when Heavy Machinery was called up in 2019. Then, the team was split up in October via storyline contrivances involving the Miz. A planned feud with ex-partner Otis never materialized.

Next stop?: The Twilight Zone! Just kidding. Have no clue.

Back to Joe. It's been speculated that his injury history contributed to WWE's decision to cut him loose, but smart money is they'll regret that as soon as Joe gets past the 90-day no compete clause in July. Returning to ROH or Impact is certainly possible, and people are also touting Japan or AEW.

Grit & Glory gets an A.

Thursday, April 15, 2021

Advertising For Dummies: Now, THIS is fake news (1985)

 The infamous Weekly World News, at last check, was an online-only entity, driven off the newsstand shelves by the popularity of Comedy Central's satirical Daily Show, among other things. At one point, it spun off its own short-lived TV series, which we discussed many moons ago, but it was also a sister publication of the National Enquirer, which now dabbles almost exclusively in fake news as an overpriced tabloid.

In 1985, the publishers launched an ad campaign. Ex-Electric Company regulars Jim Boyd & Skip Hinnant appear individually in the first two of the three spots shown in this video:

Baseball this 'n' that

 Five days after San Diego's Joe Musgrove threw the 1st no-hitter in Padre history, the Chicago White Sox had the 20th no-no in team history, and very nearly the 4th perfect game.

Carlos Rodon etched his name in the record books Wednesday for the ChiSox, in 3rd place in the AL Central, with his gem. Only a hit batsman with 1 out in the visiting 9th prevented the perfecto.

Check the highlights:

Play by play announcer Jason Benetti, who succeeded the ultimate homer, Ken "Hawk" Harrelson, is also doing work for ESPN this season to get his name out there. Former Cubs announcer Len Kasper called the game for ESPN Radio. Congratulations to Rodon & the White Sox.
Just a few months after his passing, Hall of Famer Henry "Hank" Aaron will be honored in Atlanta as the school board there voted to change the name of a school after discovering that it was originally named for a Confederate soldier who later was a leader of the Ku Klux Klan. The school will officially be rechristened the Hank Aaron New Beginnings School, and it'll take effect for the 2021-22 school year.
Winning percentage is often lost as a key element in the standings.

Not so this year, as the Mets will happily demonstrate.

The Amazin's sit in 1st place in the NL East after taking the first three games of their series with Philadelphia, dropping the 2nd place Phillies to .500 with a 5-1 verdict on Wednesday. The Mets have only played 8 games (5-3) due to one suspended game vs. Miami and having an opening series vs. Washington wiped out due to a COVID outbreak two weeks ago. Now, they have to hope they can play today, as, at last check, it's raining in Queens, with the game set to start at 12:10 pm (ET). The forecast isn't exactly lovely, either, for the team's 1st trip to Denver in 2 years when they play the Rockies starting tomorrow.

Update, 12:37 pm (ET): Today's game has been rained out.
We reported the other day that ESPN/Fox baseball analyst Alex Rodriguez had bought a stake in the NBA's Minnesota Timberwolves, and we wondered if actress-singer Jennifer Lopez was part of the group. Now, we have our answer.


On Wednesday, Lopez & Rodriguez ended their engagement, choosing to remain friends after weeks of denials amid early reports of a break-up.

Now, we have to wonder, due to his employment at ESPN, would there be a conflict of interest, due to ESPN's NBA contract, if he stays there. We'll have to wait & see.

Tuesday, April 13, 2021

More Republican Sour Cream

 After the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) decided to pause the release of 1-dose Johnson & Johnson COVID vaccines due to blood clots surfacing on some patients, former president Donald Trump issued another of his lame-ass statements, where, as usual, he refused to admit he was wrong about the November election, continuing to claim it was stolen more than five months after it took place, and claimed that the FDA paused the J & J vaccine for political reasons.

As usual, Citizen Pampers is wrong. If the FDA was biased against Johnson & Johnson, a well known brand best known for shampoo and being the parent company of McNeil & Co., the makers of Tylenol, they wouldn't have approved the vaccine. But they did. Trump still wants credit for initiating the approval of the Pfizer vaccine, but he isn't going to get it. He doesn't care that there are investigations against him in New York and elsewhere that would expose how much of a fraud he really has been his entire public career. So he keeps feeding garbage to the Legion of The Brainwashed, giving them false hope.

It's what con men do.

Before we continue, let us introduce you to the new mascot of the Republican Party. You might know him from your childhood if you're a baby boomer.

Vincent Van Gopher was a frenemy of Deputy Dawg back in the 60's. Gophers are known to have poor vision, which is why I now refer to the Republicans as GOPers. It fits. They've blinded themselves to reality, pinning their faith on the most famous con man this side of Joe Isuzu.

I would use another Terrytoons character, Silly Sidney, the elephant, but I already gave his ID to Sidney Powell.

In Washington, Josh Bawley and Ted "Sea" Cruz heled a presser earlier announcing that they would introduce legislation to strip Major League Baseball of its anti-trust protections, just because commissioner Rob "Mighty" Manfred dared to pull the All-Star Game from Atlanta due to the signing of a reportedly restrictive voter rights bill into law. This same legislation prompted director Antoine Fuqua and actor-rapper Will Smith to pull a planned feature film out of Atlanta before production began. Bawley, Cruz, and other GOPers are calling for boycotts of Coca-Cola (good luck with that) and Delta Airlines because of their objections.

See what I mean about being blind to reality?

This is what happens when the GOPers panic after Citizen Pampers got smacked down at the polls, and they lost two Georgia Senate seats in January. They still need to bow down to the false king to appease him. The Georgia voting rights law will get smacked down as well, eventually. The only part I agree with is the need to show ID, which makes sense. Suppressing minority & elderly voters? Not so much.

Just remember. The Republicans have used an elephant for years as a symbol of strength. Since they've weakened themselves, well, they deserve Mr. Van Gopher.

A little of this and a little of that

 Just as the prosecution rests in the Derek Chauvin murder trial in Minneapolis, a female police officer's fatal mistake in a suburb of the Twin Cities has the area up in arms yet again.

You've heard by now how 20 year old Daunte Wright was killed by a Brooklyn Center police officer who thought she was reaching for a taser instead of the handgun she eventually used. BCPD officers had learned Wright had an outstanding warrant after he was pulled over for a traffic stop on Sunday. The weapons mix-up exacerbated the situation, leading to protests from the African-American community late Sunday and yesterday.

In between, three Minnesota pro sports teams, the NHL's Wild, the NBA's Timberwolves, and the Twins, who were to play a matinee vs. Boston at Target Field, postponed their games out of respect to public safety. Can't blame them for erring on the side of caution.
Speaking of Major League Baseball, umpire Joe West, one of the most despised by players & fans alike, is en route to passing Hall of Famer Bill Klem, and likely heading to the Hall himself, for the record for most games officiated.

On Monday, West won a defamation lawsuit against former player Paul Lo Duca, who played for the Mets, Marlins, and Dodgers during his career, and is now a horse racing analyst. Lo Duca, in a podcast, alleged that West had been bribed by pitcher Billy Wagner, who played with Lo Duca with the Mets in 2006-7, in order to help Wagner. West said no such thing happened, suggesting that Lo Duca had misremembered events. West was awarded $500,000.

West, who moonlights as a country singer in his spare time, could probably use the money to fund a recording session after the season....!
The Academy Awards used to be handed out in the spring. Then, some genius decided to move the event to February for ratings purposes.

This year, the Oscars move back to April, airing on ABC April 25, bumping American Idol aside for a week. Well, the May sweeps follow the Oscars, so this gives ABC a headstart on ratings.
The Anti-Defamation League is calling for Tabloid Carlson's head on a platter, if ya will, demanding that Fox Shmooze pink slip him for promoting white supremacist views on his nightly garbage hour.

Unfortunately, the Murdoch family is unwilling to comply, and they're standing behind Tabloid, another spoiled rich boy, just like Citizen Pampers and Swinging Gaetz, If Affluenza was a real disease, Fox Shmooze would never acknowledge a cure even exists.

Someone check and see if one of Fox Shmooze's stockholders has the initials DJT.......!

Monday, April 12, 2021

Horse nonsense: Hoofs & Goofs (1956)

 After the passing of Shemp Howard, the Three Stooges reloaded, bringing in Joe Besser (ex-The Abbott & Costello Show), an old friend of Shemp's, to take the vacant spot.

The first outing, unfortunately, is also one of the lesser lights of the Stooge filmography.

"Hoofs & Goofs" takes a poke at reincarnation. In this case, the boys' sister, Birdie (Moe in drag in a dual role), supposedly had passed on, and has been reincarnated as a horse, much to Joe's delight, but it causes problems for the guys when the horse is expecting.

Ruth Godfrey White was the voice of Birdie the horse, physically performed by "Tony the Wonder Horse".

You might think the Stooges jumped the shark with Besser, as he was replaced for the movie series by Joe DeRita, who was a better fit. There's a reason why, in the 80's, the Jump 'N' The Saddle Band didn't name check Besser in the lyrics to "The Curly Shuffle".

Rating: C-.

Sports this 'n' that

 Mets pitcher Marcus Stroman has every right to be angry after his start Sunday was cut short after just 9 pitches and seven minutes. 

It was already raining in Flushing when the game started on time at 1:10 pm (ET). At 1:17, plate umpire D. J. Reyburn called for the tarp to be placed on the field for a rain delay. Two hours later, the game was "suspended", and will be completed as part of a day-night double-header later this season. Stroman, for his part, was upset that the team decided to go ahead and start the game, putting the players on both the Mets and the visiting Miami Marlins at risk of illness. 

I feel his pain. Back in the day, baseball teams didn't put profit margins ahead of player & fan safety. There was many a day in my youth, back when WTEN had local broadcast rights to the Mets (and at one time, the Yankees, too), when the station would post a graphic announcing a rainout, and they would sub a movie to fill the time. 

Today, because of the ridiculous player salaries, teams will take the risk in order to recoup the money spent on salaries.

New owner, same old dysfunction along the chain of command.
WWE is shuffling the deck with its announcers.

Recently, backstage reporter Charly Arnolt (nee Caruso) left the company to work full-time for ESPN. Beginning tonight, former ESPN anchor-announcer Adnan Virk joins the Monday Night Raw broadcasting team, replacing Tom Phillips, who slides over to 205 Live, which airs Fridays on Peacock (WWE Network was folded into Peacock in the states a few days ago). Corey Graves moves back to Raw from Smackdown to work with Virk and Byron Saxton, replacing Samoa Joe, who apparently will be activated from the disabled list (concussions) shortly.

Photo courtesy

Virk is also a studio host for MLB Network, which he joined after leaving ESPN in 2019. MLB has another ex-ESPN studio host/wrestling fan in Robert Flores, who mixes in some WWE references when on the air. 
WWE certainly got what it wanted to get on Access Hollywood, Entertainment Tonight, etc. over the last two nights of Wrestlemania.

On Saturday, rapper Bad Bunny made his wrestling debut, paired with Damian Priest to put down John Morrison (Hennigan) & Michael "The Miz" Mizanin, who have mocked Bunny by cutting novelty rap tracks in the run-up to the match. Bunny pinned Miz after a cross-body block off the top rope, with Miz on the shoulders of Priest.

Bunny will return down the line, but the implication last night is that he's preparing for a concert tour that won't start until next February.

Meanwhile, YouTube star Logan Paul was acting as a cornerman for Sami Zayn in the latter's match against Kevin Owens (Steen). Zayn's gimmick of being a conspiracy theorist has been a parody of a certain former president's claims of fraud in the last election. Owens pinned Zayn, who turned on Paul afterwards. Paul tried to befriend Owens, who wasn't having any of that and pulled a page out of Stone Cold Steve Austin's playbook, using Austin's finisher, the stunner, to drop Paul. Owens has used the stunner the last several months to save wear and tear on his body instead of using a sit-out powerbomb.
Japan's Hideki Matsuyama became the first man from his country to win the Masters on Sunday. His first major tournament victory gives Matsuyama 6 PGA titles total in his career. The LPGA has had champions from Korea and Japan in recent years, but Matsuyama gets the headlines today.
Reports are that ESPN/Fox analyst Alex Rodriguez is buying the NBA's Minnesota Timberwolves. No word on whether his lady, singer-actress Jennifer Lopez, was part of the group with Rodriguez in buying the team.
WROW morning host Ben Patten goofed in reading off baseball scores this morning, as he had Sunday's Yankees-Rays result backwards. The Bombers salvaged a game in the weekend series with Tampa Bay, 8-4, but Patten repeatedly misread the result, claiming Tampa won, presumably until a listener called to correct him. Happens occasionally.

Sunday, April 11, 2021

In Theatres: Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

 It was a once in a lifetime event many years ago, in "King Kong vs. Godzilla". Technology has changed with the times, and the two iconic monsters are now part of a shared universe at Legendary Pictures & Warner Bros..

"Godzilla vs. Kong", to reverse the billing for the "rematch", follows each individual icon's last screen adventure, and is set five years after Godzilla had last bested King Ghidorah, the three-headed monster. The themes in the movie shouldn't surprise anyone, either. A businessman sets Godzilla vs. King Kong, bent on replacing 'Zilla with a robot duplicate (old school fans know what I'm talking about). In effect, "Godzilla vs. Kong" actually remakes two Godzilla movies at the same time.

And for those of you who've been complaining about singer-actress Millie Bobby Brown, she does fine here. Then again, this is the first film I've seen her in, so I can't side with the consensus, anyway.

Check the trailer. It's in theatres & HBO Max.

This was a fun trip.

Rating: A.

America's Oldest Baby is at it again

 Some people will never learn.

Former president Donald Trump is one of those people.

On Saturday, Citizen Pampers threw Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell and his wife, former Transportation Secretary Elaine Chao, under the bus, claiming that the former didn't do enough to help him in the 2nd impeachment trial in February. I mean, like, dude, you were acquitted, and that was a foregone conclusion. Be happy with that, although I'm not so sure the marks (GOP donors) you brought to Mar-a-Lago Saturday night can put up with your lack of acceptance of reality for much longer.

"WAAAHHHH!!! I helped you keep your Senate seat, and you couldn't do anything for me? WAAAHHH!"

Actually, Trump is lying, as usual. McConnell had already established his reputation in Kentucky, and needed no help in getting re-elected in November. All Citizen Pampers is trying to do is take credit for someone else's success, as usual, because he wants the spotlight on him, no matter what. Being a career misogynist and a lifetime Weasel, he ridiculed Mrs. McConnell's looks for no other reason than, well, because he thinks he can get away with it.

Ignorant of the fact that his endorsement usually means the kiss of death for GOPers running for office, Trump has sworn that he'll help the GOP win back control of the Senate next year in the mid-term elections. He's also ignorant of the fact that by the time November 2022 comes around, he could be in no position to do anything, if the cases against him in New York go to trial. There's a better chance of him being sent to Bellevue (because he's not all there) than to Federal prison, largely because of his age. His psychological need for the spotlight has gotten him in more trouble than he'd care to admit, and his lawyers are still fighting to keep his tax records from being given to Congressional committees, even though that is a lost cause.

And we won't even talk about his Mini-Me in Florida. That's for another day.

Trump adds another pair of Weasel ears to his growing collection.

Saturday, April 10, 2021

A Classic Reborn: Kung Fu (2021)

 Greg Berlanti may have just found a successor to Supergirl, which is ending later this year, in terms of girl power on the CW. And it's not based on a comic book.

Kung Fu is a reimagining of the former ABC series from the 70's which turned David Carradine into a pop culture icon. However, this version is set in the present day, as was the 1990's Kung Fu: The Legend Continues, a syndicated series that brought Carradine back to the role of Caine.

This time, the protagonist is Nicky Shen (Olivia Liang), who returns home to San Francisco after the Shaolin monastery she had been in for three years was destroyed by raiders. After her shifu, or, mentor, is killed by an assassin who also stole a sacred sword, Nicky realizes that the assassin is now after her as well, while seeking other artifacts in a grab for power. At the same time, she learns that her family is indebted to a triad. 

The original Kung Fu presented its protagonist as a fugitive who dispensed his brand of justice in his travels. Here, Nicky wins over her family after her father is attacked, which fulfills the CW's mission statement of building their adventure shows around families. In the course of the season, Nicky will be fighting battles on two fronts, protecting her family from the triad, while attempting to avenge her mentor's death.

Check the trailer:

Early reports said that Kung Fu had a strong opening, better than the show it's filling in for, Riverdale, which won't finish its season until the summer.

Rating: A.

A hometown boy makes good

 It was news when ex-Tri-City Valleycat Joe Musgrove left the Pittsburgh Pirates in the off-season, traded to his hometown San Diego Padres, a team on the rise under 2nd year manager Jayce Tingler. 

On Friday in Arlington, Musgrove made Padre history, as San Diego was the last team to have a no-hitter pitched for them. Not even the Lone Ranger could've helped Texas on this night. Video courtesy of Major League Baseball's YouTube channel:

No truth to the rumor that the Padres plan to release the game film in 3D.

Friday, April 9, 2021

Farewell to a local legend: Ernie Tetrault (1926-2021)

 I don't think there's anyone in the 518 who didn't grow up watching WRGB news in the 60's, 70's, & 80's, anchored at 6 & 11 pm by Ernie Tetrault. The venerable TV & radio personality spent 42 years at WRGB, retiring in 1993.

File photo courtesy of WRGB, posted by WAMC.

Tetrault began his career in radio at WTRY, when the station was based in downtown Troy. He moved to WRGB in 1951, initially hosting a localized version of NBC's Today before moving to the anchor desk in the early 70's. He regularly went into the field, as far out as Vietnam and Saudi Arabia. He went undercover on the streets of Albany as a homeless man in 1988 to call attention to the still-growing issue of homelessness in the 518.

Tetrault made a cameo appearance, via a newscast, in the movie, "Sneakers", with Robert Redford and Dan Aykroyd. After retiring in 1993, Tetrault remained a presence in advertising, doing a series of ads for the area's coalition of Ford dealerships, and print ads to promote hearing aids. Two hoirs ago, we learned of his passing at 94 after an illness. Tonight, all of the area's television stations are paying tribute to him.

Earlier today, England said goodbye to Prince Phillip, who had passed away at 99. I'd like to think that Ernie Tetrault was television royalty. Rest in peace.

Thursday, April 8, 2021

They don't make eye drops like this anymore (1976)

 Norwich tried to compete with the makers of Visine when it came to eye drops in the 70's. Unfortunately, Ocusol isn't available anymore, and Visine's only competition seems to be coming from Bausch & Lomb these days.

Anyway, Ocusol was introduced in 1976, and actress Judy Graubart (The Electric Company), no stranger to commercials, appears in this ad:

A women's empowerment conference should be headlined by women. So why is Matt Gaetz the headliner?

 With allegations of human trafficking swirling around Florida Rep. Matt "Swinging" Gaetz, it boggles the mind that he's been booked as the headline speaker at a female empowerment conference at Trump National-Doral (formerly the Doral Country Club) in Miami. Apparently, America's Oldest Baby wanted his protege to be the star of the show, when any number of women more qualified to speak could've filled the bill. I'll have a list later.

Farron Cousins explains:

I think Farron knows that Bill Cosby is unavailable (prison).

Given the animosity that Donald Trump has created with women over the years, from Rosie O'Donnell to Hillary Clinton to E. Jean Carroll, I'm stunned he didn't ask his wife, Melania, to be the headliner. Or any of these:

Stephanie McMahon (WWE Chief Brand Officer--mother Linda ran the Small Business Administration from 2017-19).
Kim Ng (Miami Marlins GM).
Laura Ingraham (Fox Shmooze).
Jeannine Pirro (Fox Shmooze).
Marjorie Taylor Greene (aka Duchess of Dumb II).
Meghan McCain (The View).

And there are plenty of others.

Gaetz comes off now as being a perverted adolescent who never grew up. Kinda like Citizen Pampers himself. I wouldn't be surprised if this ended up a super-spreader event, as MAGA events usually are.

Wednesday, April 7, 2021

Advertising For Dummies: A "sparkle girl" at a gas station? (1970's)

 Union 76 decided to try a little sales gimmick in the early 70's with a "Sparkle Girl". I guess the idea is that she worked in the promotions department and made the rounds of various Union 76 stations.

Actress Joanna Cameron is the "Sparkle Girl" here, with Casey Kasem doing the voice-over at the end. Joanna is better known to millions of 70's Saturday morning viewers from the 1975-8 series, The Secrets of Isis.

If anyone can tell me when this ad first aired, we'll amend the subject line.

A little of this and a little of that

 Major League Baseball is moving this year's All-Star Game to Coors Field in Denver, and the GOPers are crying foul because while Colorado has similar voting rights laws to the ones just enacted in Georgia, it's not as restrictive as the shamelessly bigoted legislation signed into law by Governor Brian Kemp last week.

Most residents in Colorado vote by mail, and have no problem with Voter ID cards. Kemp represents the butt-hurt Trumpian sheep disengaged from reality, who can't handle the Georgia GOP losing two Senate seats back in January.

Karma being what it is, the Braves, who've gotten caught in the crossfire, are 0-4 heading into play today.
Fox Shmooze primetime opinionator Tabloid Carlson is trying a new spin on the January 6 attack on the Capitol. All I'm going to say is that Tabloid, once again, got roasted on Twitter for trying the Vince McMahon tactic of revisionist history on an audience that knows better. McMahon, you see, is of the misguided belief that his audience can't remember storylines past 4-6 weeks unless he decides to continue them in the long term. Carlson, being a dunce himself, thought his "low information" audience wouldn't remember what happened three months ago. He found out otherwise, but he'll never admit to being wrong.
Looney Lin Woodchips is at it again.

The ambulance chaser, now based in South Carolina, wants to be the head GOPer in Gamecock Country.

Despite facing allegations of voting in South Carolina while still a Georgia resident in November, Woodchips, who is taking aim at the chairmanship of the SCGOP, and targeting Senator Lindsey (Not-so-Golden) Graham and former Governor Nikki Haley, at the same time, is better off in a mental ward.

No, what will likely happen is that Woodchips will be facing legal issues he can't handle in both Georgia & South Carolina, and will end up disbarred as an attorney, something that should've happened already. Graham won't be up for re-election for another five years, at which point Woodchips will likely be in a sanitarium, anyway. Just sayin'.

Tuesday, April 6, 2021

Sports this 'n' that

 With the return of fans in the stands in ballparks as the 2021 season begins, there are going to be incidents like the one in Anaheim on Monday.

To many, the Houston Astros remain public enemy #1 because of the 2017 cheating scandal that led to the team's 1st World Series title. As the Astros were introduced, ex-Angel Martin Maldonado was spared the wrath of the Angels' fans. One wonders what will happen if former Astro manager AJ Hinch will be similarly greeted when he brings the Detroit Tigers to town later this season. Current Houston manager Dusty Baker understands the lingering anger. 

However, things got goofy during Monday's game.

Photo courtesy of Yahoo!

Some of these venting fans found a creative way to send a message, but it was also a dangerous means of conveying that message. Garbage cans, both metal and inflatable plastic, were launched onto the field, forcing the Angels' ground crew to clean up the mess, delaying the game. The same scene will repeat itself over and over again until commissioner Rob Manfred and city officials in each MLB city, including, of course, Boston and New York, do something to prevent such dangerous misconduct. 

It's been three and a half years. Let it go.
Everyone assumed Gonzaga would win the NCAA men's basketball championship on Monday. 

Someone forgot to consider their opposition, Baylor.

The Bears, whose women's teams have been among the elite in recent years, captured their first men's title in a stunning title game.
Several prominent GOPers, including Texas Governor Greg Abbott, are throwing their support behind Georgia Governor Brian Kemp after MLB decided to move this year's All-Star Game from the Peach State after Kemp signed a controversial voting rights bill that, reportedly, is meant to restrict the rights of minority and elderly voters in an attempt at the GOPers regaining control of the state. America's Oldest Baby, Donald Trump, put his two cents in over the weekend, just so he'd have something to get his name in the paper.

Do yourselves a favor. Give it up. While voter ID makes sense to ensure there's no attempt at fraud, it's the idea of restricting access for minority voters that has critics upset. Kemp, of course, is denying that he's done anything wrong, but transparency would be a good idea in this case.
It's just one game, but a Mets sub on Reddit was loaded with angry fans after the bullpen blew a 2-0 lead in the 8th inning, enabling the undefeated Philadelphia Phillies to beat the Mets, 5-3. Mets ace Jacob deGrom didn't quite do his best Shohei Ohtani impersonation, although he had two hits and an RBI at the plate, but he was lifted after 77 pitches through 6 innings. As usual, these fair weather fans were claiming that someone in the front office was giving 2nd year manager Luis Rojas his marching orders. I doubt that. The Mets' announcers discussed the fact that Rojas had made his plans known earlier in the day.

No, what these fans want is for deGrom to go at least 8 innings in each start, and for the Mets to have 5-6 or more runs on the board by the time he's done. That would be fine later in the season, but these idiots don't see the point of protecting their star pitcher this early in the season.

Same whining, different year. Nothing ever changes.

Monday, April 5, 2021

Musical Interlude: The Hustle (1975)

 It was the dawn of the disco era, and with it came a brand new dance craze. "The Hustle", which was a huge hit for Van McCoy.

Some of the footage in the video comes from The Mike Douglas Show:

Unfortunately, disco didn't quite make it to the end of the decade.

Sunday, April 4, 2021

A debate over Lysol in a grocery store? (1981)

 Oh, this is rich. Rich with talent, that is. And you wouldn't see this kind of kerfluffle in today's supermarkets.

A couple is out shopping and a can of Lysol is being passed around until a clerk (Roger Bowen, ex-Arnie) explains how the disinfectant is now in two varieties. Our cast also includes Vernee Watson (ex-Welcome Back, Kotter, Carter Country), Harvey Korman (ex-The Carol Burnett Show), and Beverly Archer (later of Mama's Family and Major Dad):

Saturday, April 3, 2021

You reap what you sow: MLB pulls the All Star Game from Atlanta due to voting rights controversy

 Georgia Governor Brian Kemp will never admit it, but it's his fault that Major League Baseball has taken the 2021 All-Star Game and the 1st Year Entry Draft out of Atlanta, with a new site to be determined.

This is all because Kemp, a Republican, signed a new voting rights bill into law, and despite the predictable posturing from the GOPers, including former president Donald Trump, claiming that MLB "caved in to pressure" (they didn't), the truth is that the GOPers are, five months later, still butt-hurt over losing the White House and a pair of Senate seats, and enacted the new law, which critics say is essentially illegal anyway, to "suppress" minority voters who are believed to favor Democrats.

Let's be real. Four years ago, the NBA pulled its All-Star Game from Charlotte because of an anti-transgender law, since repealed. In 1991, the NFL decided not to have the Arizona Cardinals host the Super Bowl because Arizona refused to recognize Martin Luther King Day as a national holiday. However, the Big Game has been played in Arizona since then. The common thread? Republican-controlled governments in Arizona and North Carolina created those scenarios, just like in Georgia. The GOPers just don't get it. You can't predict how people will vote, so why discriminate against minorities, such as African-Americans and Asian-Americans? Because the GOPers want to ensure they retain power. As noted, they've already lost 2 Senate seats in Georgia. Kemp stupidly claimed that MLB is "afraid" of President Biden, when instead the President threw his support behind MLB's position.

As far as Kemp and the voting rights law? This, too, will be repealed, and no amount of whining from Trump and his sycophants will change that. To paraphrase the Blue Oyster Cult's "Godzilla", history has shown again and again how Republicans expose the folly of man. Ain't that the truth.

What Might've Been: That's My Line (1980)

 At the beginning of the 80's, the networks were experimenting with "reality" TV. NBC, starved for a hit series other than Little House on The Prairie or Diff'rent Strokes, turned to George Schlatter (Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In), and got a few years out of Real People. Independent producer Alan Landsburg (In Search Of....) was in charge of ABC's That's Incredible!. So, how would CBS respond? By calling on some friends.

Specifically, game show icons Mark Goodson & Bill Todman, no strangers to scripted programming themselves (i.e. Branded, The Rebel). In the summer of 1980, Goodson-Todman served up That's My Line, a summer series that gave Bob Barker something to do while Price is Right was on summer break.

That's My Line ran for two short seasons in the summers of 1980 and '81. A YouTube commentator has noted how the scripted elements of the show were a little embellished, which, it can be argued, could also apply to its competitors. One episode featured radio & cartoon legend Mel Blanc and his son, Noel. We have a clip of that over at Saturday Morning Archives.

This complete episode, the only full broadcast available, comes from 1981.

I think CBS realized they wouldn't get very far with this Line if it ran for a full season, hence it being a short season entry. Turns out they were right. Real People & That's Incredible didn't get past the halfway point of the decade.

No rating.

Friday, April 2, 2021

A little of this and a little of that

 An outbreak of COVID-19 in Washington has forced postponement of a season opening series between the Mets and the Washington Nationals. As of press time, after 1 positive test had been reported earlier in the week, we're now learning there were more, and MLB's contact tracing has forced the series to be scrubbed entirely, meaning that the Mets will now open in Philadelphia on Monday, and the Nationals' home opener, also Monday, will be against Atlanta.

You'd think they'd have figured it out by now, but COVID is like the joker in the deck. Wild and unpredictable.
Florida Congressman Matt "Swinging" Gaetz isn't exactly popular in Washington, either, but for a different reason.

Photo courtesy of Getty Images/Yahoo!

Earlier this week, Gaetz whined to Tabloid Carlson on Fox Shmooze about his family supposedly being the targets of an extortion scheme by a Pensacola based lawyer, asking for $25 million in exchange for an investigation into Gaetz' alleged involvement with a teenage girl across state lines "going away". However, media sources paint a different picture, that the lawyer wanted the $25 million to fund the release of an American held in Iran, and that in return for the money, he'd do what he could to help Rep. Gaetz. 

Gaetz decided to play the victim card rather than tell the whole truth. However, the unidentified lawyer isn't exactly out of the woods yet, either. While Gaetz was fishing for sympathy, ignoring the fact that there is an American citizen held prisoner in Iran, presumably on trumped up charges, one wonders if the lawyer was actually on the up and up about the prisoner. We'll just have to wait & see about this.
Hollywood's obsession with repackaging old movies for new audiences is getting old itself.

For example, WB is releasing a remake of "Mortal Kombat", based on the video game, in two weeks, in theatres & on HBO Max. All this says is that studio executives are too lazy to look at original ideas these days, and that pre-sold-to-audience product is a lot more important, which is why we're seeing all these remakes & reboots on television and at the multiplexes (which are reopening). I don't think they realize that oversaturating the market with these reboots is going to want moviegoers to start wanting original material after all.

Stay tuned.

Thursday, April 1, 2021

Origin of a Classic: The pilot of Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In (1967)

 As everyone knows, Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In was added to the NBC schedule as a mid-season replacement for The Man From U. N. C. L. E. when the spy drama was cancelled halfway through its 4th & final season. In those days, a sure sign of fall was when the network ran the Miss America Pageant, hosted by Bert Parks. Its lead-in in 1967 was the pilot episode of Laugh-In.

Not everyone's on board for this one. For example, Goldie Hawn had committed to CBS' freshman comedy, Good Morning, World, co-starring with Ronnie Schell, Joby Baker, & Billy DeWolfe. Gary Owens was inexplicably absent. The only holdovers from the pilot, aside from Dan Rowan & Dick Martin, of course, were Jo Anne Worley, Ruth Buzzi, Arte Johnson (familiar to Saturday morning audiences from NBC's Super Six), & Judy Carne. Joining the party: Ken Berry, fresh from F-Troop, Barbara Feldon (Get Smart), Monty Landis, a frequent guest on The Monkees, Larry Hovis (Hogan's Heroes), who would appear during season 1, since Hogan's Heroes had finished most of season 3 filming by the time Laugh-In went to series, and Pamela Austin.

If memory serves me, Landis was gone by the time the series began, but don't hold me to it.

So, in honor of April Fools' Day, here we go!:

Edit, 12/30/21: The pilot is back, courtesy of Shout! Factory:


No rating. Just a public service.