If it hasn't worked before, why try it again?

 "It", in this case, is Citizen Pampers (Donald Trump) making false claims about political rivals, and claiming they're not eligible to be president.

Throughout Barack Obama's 2008 campaign and his subsequent administration (2009-16), Trump insisted that Obama, the 1st African-American elected President, wasn't born in this country. Even after officials in Hawaii produced documents that proved Obama was born there, Trump persisted with his lies. 

"WAAAAH! He's not a true American! WAAAAHHH!"

During the 2016 primary season, after Raphael "Ted" Cruz won the Iowa Caucus, Trump accused him of cheating, and made spurious claims about Cruz's citizenship, since the Texas Senator spent part of his formative years in Canada. Today, Cruz is just another GOP sycophant, picking online fights he can't win and engaging in culture wars, usually with characters from Sesame Street. It's fair to say he's fallen in line.

Four years ago, during his re-election campaign, Trump turned his attention of California's Kamala Harris, and the birther nonsense started anew. As we all know, Trump is still in denial about losing to Harris and President Joe Biden to this day publicly. For the 2nd time, a Democratic candidate made history, as Harris, with her multi-national background, became the 1st female VP.

It's also fair to say that Trump and his Legion of The Brainwashed won't be satisfied unless the Orange Toddler is back in the White House. However, former South Carolina Governor & UN Ambassador Nikki Haley, because her parents are from India, has become Diaper Don's latest target.

"Her parents weren't born here, so she can't run! WWAHHHHH!"

He made the same argument against Harris, and that failed, so what makes him think it'll work this time? Haley's parents, like Harris' parents, are naturalized citizens. Both Harris & Haley were born in this country, so they are eligible.

So why is he going after Haley this close to this year's Iowa Caucus, on top of all of his legal troubles? Because at his core, he's a scared little boy who is finding out---and denying----that a lifetime of pampering & privilege won't do him any good anymore. Haley has picked up steam in Iowa & New Hampshire, to the point where she could win in both states.

16 years ago, the Republicans put up Sarah Palin as a prospect to be the first female VP. That failed. Nikki Haley is in a position to be the 1st female president, giving the Republicans a chance to be on the right side of history.

If only they could keep this child quiet:

"WAAAAH! WWWAHHHHH! WAAAHHH!"

Dumb Donald strikes again: Now Trump thinks Kamala Harris wasn't born here

We awarded President Trump a Dunce Cap earlier this week, and all America's Oldest Baby has done since then is justify the decision with more stupid remarks.

First, he supported a baseless claim by Professor John Eastman, writing for Newsweek, that Democratic Vice Presidential candidate Kamala (pronounced "com-ala") Harris of California, just because her parents were emigres from India & Jamaica, wasn't a US citizen. She certainly is, born in Oakland. The Associated Press obtained a copy of Senator Harris' birth certificate to put an end to that nonsense.

                                     

                                     "Boy! He's making me look bad, isn't he?"

Dumb Donald, from Fat Albert & The Cosby Kids, actually looks like a genius more than Trump does. We knew Trump would try to play the birther card once Harris was announced as former VP Joe Biden's running mate, as a means of galvanizing his shrinking voter base of suburban, disenfranchised, white voters.

But that ain't all!

Trump then went after NY Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, calling her a "poor student". She, in turn, challenged the delusional President to produce his college transcripts, promising to do the same if he did.

                                         

                                       "He won't play along. We all know that."

You're right. He'll huff & puff like the Big Bad Wolf he thinks he is, but the more stupid things he says & does, coupled with his putrid response to coronavirus, and taking cues from North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un in sending military troops to Portland to quell peaceful protests, the more likely it is he'll lose the election.

The media knows every trick Team Trump intends to use, because we've been down this road before, four years ago. It's all Trump knows. The street fighter mentality of a native New Yorker has given way to a deranged, delusional thug, behaving like he's a mob boss. Congress is better off cutting off some of his sycophantic associates, including newly appointed Postmaster General Louis DeJoyless, who is sabotaging the Postal Service at Trump's command in order to slow down absentee ballots for the election. If Congress can shut down DeJoyless, the Postal Service will be just fine, thank you.

There's a reason former WWE CEO Linda McMahon stepped down as head of the Small Business Administration after a couple of years. She's seen this kind of behavior before. From her own husband, Vince, and that's just Vince playing a character. We think. Some people think Trump is playing a character. No, this is the real thing. We think.

Dumb Donald passes the buck on the birthers

"Dumb Donald is really dumb...."---Gene Rayburn, Match Game, during the 70's.

After being accosted by a dimwitted birther wannabe recently, at which point he didn't agree or disagree with the man's notion that President Obama is a Muslim, "Dumb" Donald Trump is playing pass the buck by claiming that it was no less than Hillary Rodham Clinton who supposedly started the birther movement 7 years ago when she & Obama were running against each other for the Democratic nomination.

Had "Swillary" actually raised any issues about the then-Senator Obama's birth then, it would've been major headlines for days. But, no, only a few stragglers in the Clinton campaign formed their own opinions. For some reason, perhaps to distance himself from a sinking ship like the birther movement, Dumb Donald decided to blame Clinton, expecting the media to play along. As usual, Trump is throwing everything out there now, but it will avail him naught.

Two of his potential primary opponents, former Texas governor Rick Perry, and Wisconsin governor Scott Walker, have withdrawn from the race, and it won't surprise anyone if Dumb Donald finally runs out of stupid things to say that would have his personal army of dittoheads genuflecting before him, and drops out, too. He's not going to be President, and neither will "Swillary". It just isn't going to happen. You'd have a better chance of buying stock in Western Union than seeing either piece of tabloid bait get nominated. As the Republican "clown car" slowly empties, we'll separate the real contenders from the pretenders, like Trump.

And, just like in 2008, the media presumes too early on Hillary as the Democratic candidate.  Someone will come along, like Obama, and blow right past Clinton, who has way more baggage than Dumb Donald, anyway. Just watch. It will happen again.

Weasel of the Week: Larry Klayman

Mr. Klayman is a lawyer who has made headlines this week by filing a petition calling for---get this!---the deportation of President Obama.

SAY WHAT???

Klayman, clearly, is representing the last hope of the birthers, who just won't give up on their mindless belief that Obama was not born in this country. Klayman has gone so far as to claim that the birth certificate issued in Hawaii is a forgery fraught with errors. However, that same certificate has been certified as authentic many times over, and, just when you thought this nonsense had finally died down, along comes some other jackass to start it up again.

My advice to this ambulance chasing idiot is, simply, get over it. There will be another election 2 years from now, and someone else will be in the White House, and Obama will likely return to Chicago and live out the rest of his days in peace. Since business is SO slow at your law office, Mr. Klayman, it's clear you're just looking for attention. What you're getting, bubbelah, is a set of Weasel ears, because, just like the rest of the birthers, you don't get it.

Election Day winners & losers

Ok, so President Obama won re-election by nearly 100 electoral votes over former Massachusetts Governor Willard "Mitt" Romney. It wasn't the landslide some people thought it would be, because reportedly, the popular vote was much closer. Congratulations, then, to President Obama and Vice President Biden. Now, the speculation should start sometime around 3 years from now on who would be in line to succeed them. Trust me, NY Governor Andrew Cuomo's name will be bandied about by then..........

In Connecticut, former WWE CEO Linda McMahon failed in her second---and, she says, last---attempt at the US Senate. This time, while husband Vince appeared on Monday Night Raw, airing on same-day tape from England, he didn't try anything that would sabotage his wife's chances. Playing the good guy for a change, McMahon subtly put some pressure on figurehead executive Vickie Guerrero, perhaps in an attempt to convince her to stop her bullying tactics, as we had outlined on Monday. Whether or not that succeeds is still to be decided, but if Mrs. McMahon is sure about her decision not to make another go at it in 2014, more power to her. They actually need her back at Titan Towers to help Vince hire some creative people who actually know what they're doing......!

Meanwhile, America's Wet Blanket, Donald Trump, was at it again, criticizing the result of the election. All that says is that the Obama administration has 4 more years of Trump and his birthers raising cain to extend their 15 minutes of infamy, or, in "The Donald"'s case, the downward spiral of his celebrity. In fact, NBC news anchor Brian Williams blasted Trump on the air on Tuesday, mindful of the fact that Trump has his reality show, Celebrity Apprentice, on the docket to return in March. If he keeps making a jerk out of himself between now & then, though, this might be the end of the trail for a reality show that's been on life support since Trump joined the birther movement.

Closer to home, not much of note changed, other than the fact that former Troy Mayor Henry Tutunjian failed in his bid to win a full term in the Rensselaer County Legislature. Tutunjian was appointed to fill the seat vacated by current Mayor Lou Rosamilia last year, in effect swapping positions. According to The Record, Tutunjian is ready to walk away from politics and into private life. You can bet, however, that he'll be back at some point, perhaps returning to the starting point of his political career, and running for City Council all over again. Not right away, but probably before the end of the decade.

Perhaps the oddest result of the election was that two states legalized the use of marijuana for medicinal purposes, which likely would set off another chain reaction. Problem with this is, too many people will use the pot for something other than medicine, just as they always have. I'd say, to make this work, you'd have to have some sort of documentation, and I don't mean a prescription, mind you, to prove you intend to use it as medicine.

Somewhere out there, Cheech & Chong are packing their bags for Colorado.........

Weasel of the Week: Donald Trump

If Donald Trump has learned anything from his friendship and professional association with Vince McMahon a few years ago, it's how to pull a bait & switch on the public.

On Monday, Trump appeared on Fox & Friends on Fox News Channel and claimed he had a big announcement that would be made today that "would shake the election". Apparently, Trump hired McMahon's crack creative team, or at least the ones McMahon fired recently, because all he came up with was little more than the usual shallow need for attention.

Trump offered to donate $5 million to one of the President's charities if President Obama would publicly release his college transcripts. All this was, in truth, was a veiled attempt at once again trumpeting the Birthers' claims that the President was not born in this country. Give it a rest! Perhaps tired of Trump's act, many took to Twitter to reduce Trump's proposal to mere twaddle. Apparently, Trump knows that if he publicly attempts to continue his and the Birthers' witch hunt against Obama, he's going to lose a lot more credibility than he already has. It wasn't so long ago---last week, in fact---that Trump was touting a new season of NBC's Celebrity Apprentice. Who's going to watch that now, knowing Trump has taken the Vince McMahon path and presented himself to the public as a deranged lunatic?

In addition to a fresh set of Weasel ears, plus a tail, we'll send Mr. Trump an all-expense paid, one way trip to the Candyass Cafe, right next door to the Smackdown Hotel at the corner of Know Your Role Blvd. & Jabroni Drive. If he's lucky, he can actually buy the place.......

Weasel of the Week: Sheriff Joseph Arpaio

Maricopa County (Arizona) Sheriff Joseph Arpaio is in the news for two reasons. Try to guess which one gets him the weasel ears.

On the one hand, it seems that Arizona's controversial anti-immigration law got the attention of actor-comic George Lopez, who made light of it with some remarks directed toward Arpaio in a stand-up comedy special that aired on HBO over the weekend. Arpaio responded by inviting Lopez to meet him for a "Mexican lunch". Arpaio, known, according to Yahoo!, as "America's Toughest Sheriff", has been outspoken about illegal immigration, but it is another cause celebre that raised the profile even higher.

See, since March, Arpaio has conducted an investigation into the legitimacy of a certain birth certificate. Yep, the issue over President Obama's place of birth has come up again, and Arpaio is convinced that the document released by the White House in April is fake. 

Who is he trying to fool?

Arpaio is 80, still serving his home county at an age when most men are retired and enjoying their golden years. A 95 year old former state worker, who had signed the President's birth certificate, explained some of the numeric codes on the certificate that Arpaio and his staff couldn't quite understand. Well, guess what, Sheriff Jabroni, it's none of your concern! Why can't you and the birthers leave the President alone?

I get that this sort of thing is bound to come up during an election year, and the nation is divided over whether or not President Obama is worthy of a second term in office. Officials in Hawaii, of course, verified yet again on Tuesday that the chief executive was a native Hawaiian. Joshua Wisch, a special assistant to Hawaii's attorney general, dismissed Arpaio's claims as "untrue" and that they "misconstrue Hawaii law".

Of course, Republican candidate Mitt Romney, who'd stand the most to gain from this outrageous grandstand play, has not said anything publicly about this latest imbroglio. Just as well, too, because if he were to even so much as endorse this fool's folly, it would cost him the election.

Back in the day, the United Negro College Fund ran some PSA's with the slogan, "a mind is a terrible thing to waste". One wonders why Sheriff Arpaio is even bothering to waste his time and the taxpayers' money to further someone else's smear campaign against the President. Apparently, the only reason he's still sheriff is because he's just unwilling to step down and let someone else carry on his work. In this case, it might be time for him to consider grooming a successor.

Just as long as that successor has an open mind and isn't looking for weasel ears to wear as an accessory.

Weasel of the Week: Donald Trump

For the 2nd time, Donald Trump, not content with plotting the next season of Celebrity Apprentice, or any of his other business ventures, has earned a pair of weasel ears, and this time, we'll add a tail, because, let's face it, the man has absolutely no shame.

Trump hosted a fundraiser for Republican Presidential candidate Mitt Romney on Tuesday, and also called into the CNN program, The Situation Room, engaging in a debate with host Wolf Blitzer over----what else?---Trump's link to the "birthers". Trump thought the discussion was going to be about jobs and other campaign issues, but Blitzer, it seems, had other ideas.

The scenario now presented with Trump hitching his wagon to Romney tells me that Trump, who flirted with making a run for the White House himself before common sense took over, may be the x factor that costs Romney the election. Trump has never met a camera he didn't like, and he'll use the Romney campaign to keep the "birther" movement afloat for a few more months. It isn't enough that President Obama's approval rating is dropping, which ideally would set the stage for Romney to win the election in November, but Trump's involvement may offset that. Voters may be inclined to believe that they'd rather have the lesser of two evils, bearing in mind that under Obama's watch, our military forces took down Osama bin Laden a year ago, and might stick with the current President instead of making a change now. As long as Trump gets photo ops in the vicinity of Romney, it compromises the former Massachusetts governor's campaign.

The bottom line is, the "birthers" have, according to a Yahoo! article, been discredited, and the subject should be closed. As long as Trump's around, it won't be. If Romney wins, that won't be the end of the "birther" debate, because then, Trump may be looking at further discrediting the President. Do we really want that happening? I don't think so.

Weasel of the Week: Daryn Moran

After serving 9 years in the US Air Force, Daryn Moran was discharged earlier this week when he refused to report for duty. His excuse? He doesn't believe the validity of the President's birth certificate.

Yes, Moran has fallen in with the dreaded "birthers", the conspiracy nuts who just won't go away. Moran, and for that matter, his father, buys into the belief that President Obama was not born in this country, despite documentation that proves otherwise. He has also taken the even bolder step of calling for the arrest of the President. Oh, man! This guy is bucking for a Section 8 discharge, if you ask me, but if his demand for the President's arrest doesn't qualify as a treasonous statement, what does?

Making matters worse, Howard Moran, Daryn's father, is proud of his son for standing up for what he believes in. I hate to be the one to break it to you, Mr. Moran, but your son is standing up for a bunch of lies & fibs from a bunch of get-a-life losers who just don't get it. Daryn Moran says he's getting an honorable discharge. I don't think so. The Air Force hasn't stated exactly, only to say that Moran has been discharged, period. After serving his country for nearly a decade, Daryn Moran is letting his feelings be known about our Commander-In-Chief, which happens to be his boss, at the wrong time. If he really felt that President Obama wasn't legitimately an American citizen from birth, as the birther morons insist, defiant as ever, why didn't he ask for a discharge after Obama was elected in '08?

I've heard of falling in with the wrong crowd, but this gets the grand prize. In Moran's case, the grand prize is a set of weasel ears.

Weasel of the Week: Orly Taitz

Who is Orly Taitz, you might ask? If you haven't been reading the papers, Ms. Taitz is the self-admitted leader of the "birther" movement that has stubbornly, obsessively, questioned the legitimacy of President Obama's eligibility to run for President in 2008. Nearly 2 1/2 years after Obama, then a junior Senator from Illinois, defeated Arizona Senator John McCain to become the first African-American elected to the White House, the "birthers" have insisted that Obama wasn't born in this country, but rather in Kenya.

On Wednesday, President Obama produced a long-form live birth certificate from the hospital in Honolulu where he was born. Ms. Taitz, unsurprisingly, found an excuse to continue her mindlessly obsessive campaign. She claims that in 1961, any hospital would have used "Negro" instead of "African" to define the future President's racial origins.

Ah-ha! Therein lies the root of the "birthers"' campaign. It bothers Ms. Taitz and her supporters, which now includes last week's Weasel, Donald Trump, that an African-American was elected to the highest office in the land. Welcome to the 21st century, jabronies! It bothers them even more, I'm sure, that Sarah Palin, the former governor of Alaska, was defeated in her bid to become the first female Vice President. Of course, we'll hear from her again in short order, as she's more likely to gain the GOP nod for 2012 than a bandwagon-jumper like Trump, unless McCain gets back in the hunt for a rematch.

The President is aware that the "birthers" won't go away, always looking for excuses to continue a losing battle. It's obvious now that the longer they persist with this fool's folly, the more likely it is they'll sabotage Obama's chances of re-election next year, just by keeping what really is a non-issue at the forefront, ahead of more important concerns.

To Orly Taitz, we present a set of weasel ears and a simple message:

Get a clue, get a life, and go away!!!

Weasel of the Week: Mike Huckabee

As a Christian myself, I'm a little bit puzzled, if not also annoyed, by the public comments made by former Presidential candidate-turned-talk show host Mike Huckabee this week.

First, Huckabee made a bonehead play by mistakenly giving the dreaded birthers some ammo by implying that President Obama had spent his formative years in Kenya. It's bad enough that the birthers won't go away and won't give up their losing battle, forever claiming that the President was actually born in Kenya, not in Hawaii as his birth certificate maintains. Huckabee must've bumped his head on a door somewhere waking up one day. Nothing worse than giving a bunch of morons a reason to continue their pointless crusade of cretinism.

Then, just to prove his credibility with the Beavis & Butt-Head types in this country, Huckabee pulled a Dan Quayle and ripped into Oscar winner Natalie Portman, who is also an unwed expectant mother. For those that don't get the Quayle reference, the former Vice President made headlines while in office, I believe, for ripping a storyline on the sitcom Murphy Brown, in which the title character (Candice Bergen) was also having a child out of wedlock. Either way, it is representative of a common social problem that has been in this country for decades.

Huckabee, in both cases, may have damaged any chance he might have of getting the Republican nomination should he try to run again next year. There must be something about the governor's mansion in Arkansas that leaves a lasting, if not also damaging, effect on those who've served in that office. We all know what happened to Bill Clinton when he went from being governor to President nearly 20 years ago. Is Huckabee trying too hard to be the GOP's answer to ol' Bubba? Pray that's not the case, although foot-in-mouth disease apparently is a job hazard, as are earning a set of weasel ears for saying stupid things in a public forum in inappropriate, inopportune times.

A conspiracy in the name of needing attention

President Obama should be celebrating his birthday next week in peace. However, there are people who simply refuse to accept the fact that the Chief Executive was in fact a native of Hawaii.

They call themselves "birthers". I call them attention-seeking idiots who are mere flies on the wall compared to the larger problems that Obama has to deal with. These people refuse to accept the fact that the President, who represented Illinois as its junior Senator prior to becoming President last year, is a Hawaiian native, instead insisting that he is originally from Kenya. Obama is of Kenyan descent, and spent some of his formative years there, but as of Monday, Hawaii state officials once again verified that he was born in their state. That should be the end of the story right there, but these "birthers" won't let it drop. They listen to talk radio gasbags like Rush Limbaugh, and accept his word as gospel. Limbaugh's better off writing for a supermarket tabloid if this is what his "dittoheads" have become.

No, the truth of the matter is the "birthers" are upset because Obama is the first African-American to be elected President. They needed to find a cause to rally around in order to get attention. It doesn't matter to them that their outrageous claims have been denied repeatedly. They think it needs to be investigated completely, top to bottom. Sorry, geeks, it's not X-Files-worthy, and it never has been.

I have a pen pal in Long Island who is developmentally challenged, and believes in ridiculous conspiracies like this. I have told him repeatedly that "birthers" such as Philip J. Berg are way, way off base with their claims, but he won't listen. Neither will the "birthers" themselves, but I've got one simple, solitary message for these people:

The President is an American citizen. Get over it, get over yourselves, and get a life!